Colors 26/08/2016 16:45

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Original: Cores

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real story;
string sender = "@gtmeira";

Wife: Honey, What are you doing?
Programmer: Programming...
Wife: But why do you keep changing the colors of the letters?
--
T-shirt: Pacman

Jedi Programmer 24/08/2016 14:30

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Original: Programador Jedi

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string sender = "Joseph Kreifels II";
Boss: You have to finish this project in 2 weeks
Programmer: But we need 6 weeks
Boss: No way. The customer needs it in 2 weeks
Programmer: No. We will deliver it in 6 weeks (doing the jedi gesture)
(Later)
Alex: You had a Star Wars marathon again, right?
Programmer: Do. Or do not. There is no try.
--
T-shirt: Jedi Master

CSV Error 23/08/2016 10:28

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real story;
string sender = "Joseph Kreifels II";

User: Hi, can you help us?
Programmer: What seems to be the problem?
User: We're getting an Error ever since you made changes to our database.
Programmer: What does the error say?
User: It's saying "CSV Exported Successfully"
Programmer: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: Read error

Browsers 22/08/2016 12:52

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Original: Navegadores

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string sender = "Reinaldo Fiorentini";
User: Listen: Your system is not working... It's blah blah blah... I'm a lawyer and I blah blah blah...
Programmer: Ok. Are you using firefox, as requested?
User: Yes, I am.
Programmer: Ok. And what's the error message?
User: "Internet Explorer cannot display the webpage"
Programmer: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: I said Browser, not Bowser

Upper join 19/08/2016 14:25

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Original: Upper join

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string sender = "Reinaldo Fiorentini";
Alonso: Dude, help me to find the error on that query
Programmer: Why don't you indent your code?? Indent it to ease the understanding...
Alonso: But if I break that line, will I have to use "upper join" instead of "left join"?
Programmer: FACEPALM!
--
T-shirt: Scroll lock

How much do you charge 18/08/2016 02:19

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Original: Quanto custa um portal?

Transcription ↓

real story;
string sender = "FBastos";

User: How much do you charge to develop a website?
Programmer: Well, it depends... What kind of website do you want?
User: Nothing so big, but nothing so simple... So, how much?
--
T-shirt: True... or false

A little button 17/08/2016 15:56

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Original: Um botãozinho

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real story;
string sender = "Marcelo Alexandre";

User: The system is perfect, but it needs just one more thing
Programmer: What?
User: Only a little button at the bottom
Programmer: Ok. A little button is easy...
User: Great... So when the user clicks on this button, he may upload his videos, also may see the videos of all other users, and he may like or dislike, everything like youtube does...
(Programmer chokes with coffee)
--
T-shirt: Anything else?

Web development 16/08/2016 02:43

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Original: Sistema para web

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real story;
string sender = "@notsodeep";

Boss: Finally, after 8 months of development, the system is what we expected. Now I need you to turn it accessible online
Programmer: What?? But it wasn't designed this way. It was built to run only on desktop!
Boss: Ok. So you only have to recompile it as a website...
--
T-shirt: Coffee never lies

Prevision 15/08/2016 16:03

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Original: Previsão

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real story;
string sender = "Canez";

Boss: Do you have an estimate of when will you finish the project?
Programmer: I'll finish it till the end of next week
Boss: Ok, so pause this project and work on another project that is more urgent. So, when you finish that, you come back to the first and finish it till the end of next week
--
T-shirt: Ok, I'll finish it yesterday

Postgraduate classes 12/08/2016 17:11

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Original: Aula da pós

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real story;
string sender = "Canez";

Programmer: No, I can't work tuesday night...
Boss: Why can't you?
Programmer: I have postgraduate classes on tuesday
Boss: Are you taking postgraduate classes?
Boss: Didn't you know that this is a hard time on our company? You can't study now!
--
T-shirt: (A flux capacitor image)

 

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